Transcript
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Hey everybody, welcome to the Private Club Radio Show, where we give you the scoop on all things private golf and country clubs, from mastering leadership and management, food and beverage excellence, member engagement, secrets, board governance and everything in between, all while keeping it fun and light.
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Whether you're a club veteran just getting your feet wet or somewhere in the middle, you are in the right place.
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I'm your host, denny Corby.
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Welcome to the show place.
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I'm your host, denny Corby.
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Welcome to the show.
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In this episode I'm chatting with a new friend of mine, dana Cancelero, ccm.
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She's the GM COO, chief Operating Officer over at Crestmont Country Club, west Orange, new York, and we start off with a fantastic story of her sharing because she has an amazing background from working at Ethan Allen doing radio sales and then finding clubs.
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And we start off with a really great story of how she was working at a hotel late at night in a big storm and Stephen King walks in the Stephen King.
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So we start off with a really cool story and we talk a lot about mentorship and the rising through the ranks and in her journey as being an openly gay club manager.
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We talk about how inclusivity and equity are crucial in the club industry and what her journey was like the ups, the downs, the goods, the bads, the challenges and triumphs that she's faced in the industry and what it really boils down to.
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And a really cool point is, things really fell into place when she was able to be her authentic self.
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In the episode we talk and have insights on handling member complaints and negative feedback and what that means and how to handle that.
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And she's a big dog person, so triple kudos in my book, dog people are the best people.
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And she has Frenchies and I have an English bulldog, so I love bulldog ownership.
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But no, I'm very excited for this episode.
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It is really good.
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If you have not done so already, make sure you sign up for our newsletter to stay up to date with all of our latest releases and content.
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Head over to privateclubradiocom.
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Wait about a couple seconds.
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The box pops up.
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Big thanks to some of our show partners.
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We have Concert Golf Partners, kennis Member Vetting and Golf Life Navigators.
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You're going to hear about them later on more in the show, but right now let's welcome to the show Dana Cancelero.
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Working at a hotel was a lot of fun.
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I worked at the front desk for a while, the catering and I met Stephen King there.
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That was cool yeah.
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Cause he's up in that area.
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Moment of my life.
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Yeah, he's from Maine, so he was in maine and this was after he got hit by the car.
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Like this is right after you know that whole thing where he was walking he got hit by the car and he was like on the side of the road.
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Oh my god, you can't make this stuff up.
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Yeah, I was at the front desk.
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Sorry, if you have time I'll tell you I'll make time.
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This is, this is gold, yeah it was nuts.
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um.
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So I get a phone call.
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It's a dark winter night.
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There's like three people staying in the hotel.
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I'm by myself, I'm at the front desk, it's myself, the bartender at the restaurant and one security guard.
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That's it.
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That's the entire staff on that night.
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Is this the shining what?
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Yeah, basically Right.
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So I get a phone call from this woman and she's like my, one of my clients is driving through and he's getting tired.
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Do you guys have any rooms available?
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And I'm like oh yeah, absolutely.
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She goes.
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Oh well, he's kind of a VIP.
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Do you have a nice room?
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I'm like yeah, we have a suite.
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Telling her all about it, she's like that sounds perfect.
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I said great, last name.
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She's like King.
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I'm like King, get it.
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She's like he'll be there in about a half hour.
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I said okay, great.
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So I'm there like not breathing right For about a half hour straight.
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And then noise.
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I'm not even kidding you.
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You can't make this stuff up right.
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It's like the wind howls, the automatic doors open, the snow is flying in the background and this huge zombie figure man comes limping in the front desk, like right up to the front desk, and I'm like, oh my God, I'm like this is how I'm going to die.
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Like this is it.
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I'm done, I'm toast.
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Yeah, this is the end of my story.
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And I check him in.
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I'm being so professional because we had training on how to be professional with famous people.
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I'm professional.
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I checked this man in and he walks away and I'm not even kidding you.
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He takes three steps and he turns around and he says to me don't you love empty hotels on winter nights?
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And I was like, no, sir, I don't, and it's because of you.
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Yeah, scariest thing I've ever happened.
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I was like, wow, I got to call my mom, I got to get my affairs in order.
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Like I'm not.
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I was like counting the minutes for the night audit woman to come in.
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I was like this is it.
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This is how I'm going to die.
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This is crazy.
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I'm too young for this, please no this is it.
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This is it.
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Yeah, the grim Reaper has showed up.
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Yeah, exactly, so after that.
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I got out of hotels I was like this business is too dangerous.
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Let me get into private clubs.
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yeah, exactly sorry for you with that story.
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No, no, that that was an awesome.
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The industry needed some rainbows, though I'm glad I could bring it that that's how to.
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It's how to affect the journey like that's how to of oh, a thousand percent, yeah, yeah what was it?
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I mean like the, was it as difficult before coming in?
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Like, did you know how difficult it was going to be coming into the industry?
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And was it as difficult as you thought?
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And has it gotten better?
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Oh, it's definitely.
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It's gotten better in some instances, right Like I'm at like my club right now it doesn't matter.
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But I remember my very first conversation when I was, you know, mid manager and I'm speaking to my AGM and I'm like, well, what do you want me to say to people?
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Because they keep asking me if I have a boyfriend, a husband, like what?
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Should I say he's like um well, um, um, and you see him like bouncing up and down in the chair.
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You know being all uncomfortable.
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I'm like whenever you're ready, tell me what I should say, and I'll say it, you know I don't want to lose my job.
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I don't want to get in trouble, uh, but he was actually very nice about it and it was just, you know, I guess, whatever you're comfortable saying, uh, and continuing to work comfortably, that's what you say.
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I was like, okay, great, my non-answer um.
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But then, you know, I just started after that.
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I just kind of made it a point to always drop that in an interview somehow.
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You know, like, just so you know what you're getting into, um.
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And then since then, actually now that I'm like this, you know I've become like a pillar of the openly gay club management community, somehow, um, I have I've had young people call me, like I've literally had calls and emails from like young gay club managers that were like, how do I come out at work?
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Like what do I say?
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I'm like, well, what'd you say to your parents?
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You know, start there, let's start with that.
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But yeah, it can be tricky, but now I'm just I make sure it's very like prominent.
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So no, I was actually going to talk about, like I love just the story from the young hustler go-getter Dana to me.
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I just go back and then the Stephen King story, which I'm not going to have you tell again because I still have it from the first time and I'm going to make sure it comes in because it's so good.
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Yeah, but I was going to talk about more like the, because I liked what we were talking about mentorship, because I liked what we were talking about mentorship.
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But I mean, if you want to go into, like you know, being a gay club manager, like what that has been like, because I think the the I mean, have you talked about like the early beginning stuff, like that had to be so difficult?
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Maybe you know, or I could be totally wrong, but no, no, no, it's tricky.
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Right, it's because, again, you like find an industry that you love and you're not sure if it's going to love you back.
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Right, that's the hard part, and it's like I work hard, everyone's telling me I do a good job, but this like fundamental piece of me, like yeah, that's something all of a sudden that's going to make this industry like not possible for me and you know it's not.
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I don't think it's by design.
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Right, the club industry has always been behind.
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We're light years behind everybody all the time.
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But you know it's one of the things I said when I was on the Metropolitan Board was you know, guys, this is something we can't afford to be behind on.
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You know, when it comes to diversity and equity like we can't afford to, because it's hard enough to get young kids to work in our business Right now, you're going to alienate a whole group of them and say, by the way, thanks for applying, but not sure this industry fits.
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You know who you are.
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That's a tough message, you know, and so that's.
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I've always been a big proponent of just you know, inclusivity and equity across the board and clubs.
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And it's not easy, it's not.
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We're not built for that.
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We're built clubs, literally.
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What's the thing people say about clubs?
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My club is the most exclusive, great.
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Yeah, let's put the sign on the door Members only private don't come in.
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So it's it's tricky to build inclusivity into a quite literal exclusive environment, but I think we're we're we're doing really well and and big chapters like the metropolitan chapters working so hard to change that and it's incredible.
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It's, it's a really great thing.
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What were some of the beginning steps?
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Like what were some of the beginning I don't want to say baby steps but like what were things that helped get momentum forward.
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What were things that were done that you can remember, that you know were just good things that just kept and got the ball rolling.
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You know, on that front, I think for me it was just having, um, the fact that I was very lucky to have sort of very supportive general managers as I was a younger manager, Um, and I, I would have to say, part of it really was geography.
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You know, I'm mostly in New York, uh, which is usually in the forefront of a lot of things.
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I'm not, you know, I'd never worked in one of the square states in the middle.
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I don't know how that would go and that that can be tricky.
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No, no, that there's.
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There's something we said there.
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You know whether you did it on purpose or not, but you put yourself, or were, it seems like, in a position to where there were more opportunities and trying to put like I don't want to say what is it?
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Like a square peg in, like a circle hole, but it's like okay, if you're, if you're going to fight the battle, like maybe put the odds in your favor a little bit more.
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I don't know.
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Well, exactly, exactly, it's like but that's the thing in the club business across the board.
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Anyway, right, it's go somewhere where you're the fit right, where you make sense.
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And yeah, that does apply very much with you know.
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Folks with you know come from a different background.
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Let's say, cause it applies, it's not just you know, gay, straight, it's a lot of things you know.
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Even women in club management.
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For decades that was like, oh, there's not that many women at the table.
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Then all of a sudden folks noticed and they're like maybe we should create a specialty group for women in club management.
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You know, and now we do it all the time.
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But that was that just got created.
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What Seven, eight years ago?
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You know, that's still pretty brand new.
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Forget groundbreaking.
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We're earth shattering, I think at that point.
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But it's been, but it's been baby steps.
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But yeah, at the beginning it's, you put yourself in the right place and you have to make sure you're comfortable.
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That's what it's all about, you know anyway.
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Even in our personal lives.
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It's when you're comfortable, that's when you make the decision to sort of be who you fully are, and that was a big part of my journey as a club manager, even just the way I spoke to people.
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Quite honestly, I think about it all the time.
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When I was young, I used to make sure, oh, I want to speak correctly, I can't say anything.
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I would say to my friends.
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You know, I talk to my friends when I'm with members.
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I speak to members and then after a while I realized, well, wait a minute, I'm goofy, like why am I wasting my time being so serious?
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You know, once I started being me and being goofy is actually when my career took off, when I started interviewing as myself rather than as like what.
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I thought I needed to you know, do and say, my career just skyrocketed from there.
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How old were you and how many clubs deep, like like when?
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When was that shift?
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Yeah, yeah.
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So when I was, I was an AGM at Nassau Country Club.
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That was in 2013, 2014.
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So I was just, I just turned 30, 31.
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Yeah, and I started to realize the members, you know, they were a little more of a down to earth membership and I was like, oh, I'm so used to speaking the right way and saying the right thing that you know.
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I was like this isn't really working, like they're not getting to know me.
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So I started coming out of my shell more and more and just being me, which I thought was the last thing I was supposed to be on a day-to-day basis, I started coming out of my shell a little more and that's again.
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I was fully out of that club, which was great.
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And then, when I had my first interview for Stanford Yacht Club as the incoming general manager, I mean I nailed it.
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I just walked in and I said, you know, I thought in my head I'm like there's no way I'm getting this job, so let me go in Firing double guns, like we got this baby.
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Yeah, he had the end of the table.
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I'm like, who's that guy?
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Never met that guy before.
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He seems cool.
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All right, you know, now I know Dan.
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Well, obviously.
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But at that point I'm like, all right, guy, nice to meet you.
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Let's go in and see what happens, just being me having fun.
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And and you know what I?
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Then, at night, he's like hey, they loved you.
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I'm like what why?
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So that for me was like a turning point.
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It was like, okay, you know what, let me just be myself.
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I'm wasting time trying to be what I think everyone needs me to be, and let me just be myself, cause I think you know what, I'm okay.
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I'm not for everyone, but I'm okay.
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That's awesome and and the membership fully supports.
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Have you been in any situations that you've like?
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How have you handled?
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I don't, you know, I'm sure there's been unique situations.
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How do you handle, like you know, when you can, you can you know whether a member come.
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I don't know if members complain, like I'm sure, I'm sure you've seen everything and heard everything.
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How do you, how do you handle?
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I mean, I'm sure your skin's got to be thick.
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I mean, just well, and just to go back to your like history of, like, working in ethan allen and doing radio sales, to do radio sales you got to have thick skin anyway.
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So like, so go back, but you know.
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So, yeah, sorry, go ahead.
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No, no, that's fine.
00:13:56.239 --> 00:13:59.807
So I always say it's so funny, Someone you know.
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They say something like oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to like upset you.
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I'm like I've been a club manager for 20 years.
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I don't have feelings anymore.
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I haven't had three psychological terrorists, basically.
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So if you didn't have thick skin in my household you were not going to make it right.
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So it started there.
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And then really, yes, just like you said, radio sales, I mean talk about notes, right, it's like no, thank you, no, no, thank you.
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Phone up, closing doors, I mean that's really what it was all about.
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But after a while you start to realize it's people aren't saying no to you, right, they're saying no to the idea of the concept, the direction of the club.
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What have you?
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It's not you personally, Right, and that's what you have to remember.
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That's kind of what keeps you going from day to day.
00:14:46.850 --> 00:14:52.135
Or else, yeah, Forget it, You'll just, you'll put your head under your blanket and you'll never want to wake up in this business.
00:14:52.135 --> 00:14:54.879
It's just you have to understand what it's about.
00:14:54.879 --> 00:14:56.741
Yeah, exactly.
00:14:57.144 --> 00:14:58.229
So so, so.
00:14:58.229 --> 00:15:09.874
So going to back to like the member, like how do you handle as a professional GM, like what are those conversations like and you know what's what, what happens, you know what in those situations?
00:15:10.684 --> 00:15:10.846
Sure.
00:15:10.846 --> 00:15:13.394
So I mean, I think the most important thing, right?
00:15:13.394 --> 00:15:15.388
Everyone, I have a reputation.
00:15:15.388 --> 00:15:18.557
When I started a new club, I'm like, all right, give me your top five.
00:15:18.557 --> 00:15:21.432
I know you have the top five, complainers, the top five.
00:15:21.432 --> 00:15:26.052
Nothing's ever good enough, nothing's great, like everything at the club, like it's the members.
00:15:26.052 --> 00:15:28.046
You're like why are you a member here If you don't enjoy the club?
00:15:28.046 --> 00:15:33.312
I'm like, give me those names, right, let me just sort of take it head on, right?
00:15:33.312 --> 00:15:40.181
So I will literally seek those people out and I will call them up, email them whatever it is, text them, whatever I have to do to get them in front of me.
00:15:40.181 --> 00:15:42.048
Hi, I'm brand new here.
00:15:42.048 --> 00:15:44.173
I know you've had some issues with the club.
00:15:44.173 --> 00:15:46.265
Tell me what it is, let me know.